We may have had that thought – ‘when did life get so complicated?’ Even before becoming adults life became increasingly complicated and we long to go back to those days in our childhood where our biggest worry was gathering sticks in the garden or something (before the days where technology took over). This may be unrelated but think back to your childhood memories and you think of the happy days, where there were no worries and you can’t actually remember what you were thinking at that time.
Things begin to get complicated when you enter nursery/kindergarten, this may be because of a different environment, being without your parents and having to interact with the ‘real world’. You meet new children and adults and your world becomes slightly bigger than just your home. At that age your biggest worry may be that other child who won’t play with you or that toy you couldn’t have. These problems at the time would have seemed like the world was falling apart at that time but we’re resilient and forget about it an hour later until the next ‘apocalypse’. I suppose at that young age we have so little to worry about because we know so little, and the fact that we have our parents to rely on.
Now throughout our teenage years we begin to be a little more dramatic, where exams, friends and the opposite sex (or same) are our biggest worries. It’s understandable seeing that we spend most of our time at school. We probably interact with the people at school more than our family. Even at this point we will think back and long for those simpler times. Little do we know that as adults, we would be thinking back to this stage and wishing we were back there.. Back to the days before bills and jobs and social networking. Back to when people didn’t expect anything off you or expect you to be a ‘grown up’. It would seem as if all of a sudden all the responsibilities and all the things you should do come crashing down on you as soon as you turn 18 or 21.
As adults we get caught up in this kind of vortex, where we’re so busy and our lives are so complicated. We just have to take a breath and realise that we’re the ones that make our lives more complicated than it should be. We need to go back to our aim in life and not concentrate on our mini goals that overtake our lives such as getting the next promotion etc. I think that many of our aims in life would just to be happy in life. By having an end life goal, we can work back and see the steps we need to take in order to achieve it. We don’t want to be rushing about and suddenly thinking – why am I even doing this? As with everything, we need to take breaks and re-evaluate our lives and make sure it’s on track to achieving what we want.
We have to simplify things in order to achieve more clarity. Something that helps me simplify my life is to have less. Less of everything. If I stop craving for more things, I won’t feel like I have to sell and arm and a leg to get it, I won’t be stressing over it and I will also have a less cluttered home. This might seem obvious but by having less at home, there’ll be more space and you’ll feel freer? I don’t know if that makes sense but you’ll feel more relaxed instead of suffocated. Either way, there’ll be a lot of different ways on how people can simplify their lives. You can start with little things and you’ll see the difference.. Or if you’re happy with your life as it is… just take this as some light reading.
Till our next meeting,
This is in regards to at what point in our lives do we lose the qualities of belief and our sense of wonder from childhood. As usual there isn’t a specific point in time, but as we grow older and have more experiences both good and bad, we start to become more cynical. We used to be able to believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny and whatever else was told to us. Perhaps this belief is lessened once we’re told that Santa or whoever isn’t real. This is probably one of our earliest experiences in disappointment and a feeling of being tricked; particularly by the people we are closest to, our parents. We come to learn that this isn’t a good feeling and maybe this is where it starts. Of course all experiences are unique to each child and there could be other situations that provoke this response. At this point we are told that we are now old enough to know ‘the truth’ and that we are too old to be believing in such childish things.
We grow up meeting various people and through that, we begin to see that not everyone is nice, not everyone is truthful. We are teased for believing in certain things which teaches us how to doubt ‘facts’ presented to us. Even throughout primary school I remember that there would be tricks/games we would play on each other. We would say things to one another such as “look up, there’s the word gullible!” Many of us would look up and cause the rest of the children to laugh. Another one was “if you say the word banana really slowly, it sounds like gullible.” Of course many kids would fall for it and look silly. Although these games are seemingly innocent, it probably had a subconscious effect on us where we began to doubt what people said, so not to be laughed at.
When we are young we would be amazed by the smallest of things. Children are a good reminder of keeping that sense of wonder. Being young, we are constantly finding new things and learning about the world. Maybe as we become adults or have become adults for a while, we are so desensitized to a lot of things going on around us because we are so used to it. This could be something as simple as watching a plastic bag floating in the air or to the leaves changing colours in autumn. Of course this also ties in with the type of person we are, characteristically speaking. When we grow up these things are seen as mundane and it takes more and more for us to become in awe. We are also so preoccupied with life that we don’t stop to admire something or just to think about life once in a while. This is why it is important for us to take time out for ourselves, to adjust ourselves before entering the chaos of the world once again.
Sometimes we are lucky enough to encounter someone or a situation that gives us that sense of awe or amazement. This could be through animals or someone’s story about their life. We can see so much through social media that we feel like we’ve seen it all already. For some reason when someone finds an interest in something simple, they are often looked down on or patronized. We will hear words like “aww you’re so cute or you’re so innocent.” This maybe because it’s only a quality linked with children or they’re jealous that they can’t find the same feeling themselves. Either way, if you still have that quality, you’re very lucky, regardless of what people say!
Till our next meeting,
This question is in regards to when in our lives we start to lose the important qualities of being young. It’s almost impossible to pinpoint the exact moment or place where we lose this. It’s through the culmination of time and our experiences that we start to ‘grow up’. The qualities such as: courage, belief, sense of wonder, optimism and many more. These qualities seem to be deemed as childish, naive or silly as we grow and enter the ‘adult world’. As adults ourselves, we think of this ‘adult world’ most would imagine something very grey, somber and responsibility. As children, they would think of it as boring and serious. This was inspired by my friend who was an adventurous teenager but now she was fretting about going on a long haul flight herself. This had me thinking – at what point throughout all these years did she lose her courage? I suppose it was due to her being in her comfort zone for too long and not venturing out of it for too long.
As someone relatively young, I feel like I already have the mind and outlook of an old bitter cynical person. However I know that this shouldn’t be the case. I know that not every twenty something year old would feel this way, but I have seen a lot of people with similar feelings through the wonders of social media. Obviously this didn’t happen overnight but we seem not to notice this change until one day when we randomly experience something that makes us think ‘wow so now I’m actually an adult’. I suppose we don’t notice the change partly because it happens so gradually, as the responsibility piles on throughout our teenage years and into early adulthood. That’s why when we see children or anything that reminds us of youth/our childhood, we become nostalgic back to the days when things were so much simpler, where your biggest worry was whether or not that person at school liked you or that test tomorrow. There’s a connection with being a child, being truly happy and to all these qualities.
As adults, some of us try to go back to those times even for just a few hours through various mediums. This may be because they want that feeling again mostly due to the immense stress of being an adult. But that’s a topic for another time.. The question as to what point also depends on how fast you matured which depends on your childhood and down to the little things such as your place in the family whether it be the eldest sibling, single child etc. Back when we were children, curiosity drove us to discover things, this curiosity overpowered our fear and allowed us to explore. Somewhere along the line, fear or laziness (mostly fear), overpowers us and we make excuses to stay in our comfort zone. This can happen to people as early as their 20’s and we then go on to regret things.
Fear not though! I think that this time is the best time to rediscover that. What with all the technology we have the ability to communicate and find new things. Nowadays you hear stories about (mostly younger) people quitting their jobs in order to travel or pursue their passions. We are in an age where a lot of us have that opportunity and choice to do so; it’s only a matter of taking action. A good film that ties this all together well is The Little Prince. This is an animation/cartoon aimed at younger children but its message is very important and mostly aimed at adults. It discusses different topics but most of all it is a reminder to adults to keep the imagination and the child in us, alive.
Till our next meeting,